I get it… you had the WORST dating experience and that person broke your heart into a million pieces. They really screwed you over big time!
You now believe love ISN’T meant to happen for you! You won’t EVER meet anyone again who compares to that person — they were The One! You’re too scared and wary to get back out there. Or you “don’t do/believe in relationships.” All relationships are “doomed!”
Okay, take a breath. What’s REALLY happening is that you’re in VICTIM mode and suffering from post traumatic dating disorder, or “PTDD.” Snap out of it! As I was told before: no one has ever died of a broken heart.
Whatever happened is over, it is now in the past. Yes, it was s***! And you’re allowed to grieve. But move forward and stop wallowing in that bad experience. Focusing on how they damaged you only prevents you from moving forward and finding happiness once again.
Holding on to the past is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Let it go! I don’t care how much they hurt you, and how they were so “right” for you! Allowing the PAST to live on and dominate your future beliefs about love makes you a victim. It’s an excuse and will be a self-fulfilling prophecy, if you let it.
These are the things you should keep in mind as you try to find your soulmate:
- You aren’t any less worthy
- All relationships aren’t f*****
- Not everyone’s a cheater!
- Love IS extremely possible and meant for you
- There are plenty of GREAT people out there that are easily available to you
You HAVE to change the stories you tell yourself! This is the KEY.
Halle Berry, one of the most beautiful women in the world, was cheated on! She is proof that bad love experiences have NOTHING to do with you, or that you just aren’t beautiful or good enough!
You’re allowed to make mistakes, especially in love! It has no bearing on you and your worthiness. Successful people fail all the time. They just get back up, approach it differently and try again. They don’t give up or change their beliefs or think they’re somehow doomed!
Don’t idealize and give someone else so much power that they impact and have a hold on your future happiness way after they have left.
Stop clinging to your baggage. You have all the power depending on how you choose to show up. Create a new (baggage-free) story, replace it with new beliefs about how excited you are for your future, and allow it to be your new truth and it will, in turn, become your new reality.