So the saying goes….
And while I realize the term typically applies to marriages, as an expert matchmaker, I have seen many successful men fall into the trap of thinking that it’s easier to pay for the company of a woman rather than invest in a genuine relationship.
Why Paying for Companionship Can Cost You More
However, I am here to tell you that this cautionary tale can ultimately cost you more than you realize. In fact, it is not cheaper to keep her or even pay for her company. Men who are genuinely in a loving relationship have more success in all areas of their lives.
Many successful men find themselves in a position where they have achieved financial success but are lacking in their personal lives. They may feel that they don’t have the time or energy to invest in a genuine relationship and instead opt for the easy way out – paying for companionship.
The Pitfalls of Transactional Relationships
Another saying that isn’t lost on me: “You aren’t paying for their company; you’re paying for them to leave.” I get it. But while a transactional relationship might look like the ideal cost-effective way to have a woman in your life, the price you pay for lack of true intimacy and a true partner is far greater.
Many these days who aren’t necessarily looking for pay-to-play are resorting to using a sugar baby, a sugar daddy website, or even an arrangement site. In some ways, it is becoming more of a mainstream (if not secret) way to meet.
However, this is a dangerous game to play, and it often ends in disaster. In some cases, it can become a public relations nightmare.
Firstly, connecting with those whose number one requirement is money is a risky game.
Secondly, paying for companionship may seem like an easy solution, but it is not sustainable.
Money-based relationships often lack genuine connection and trust, which is necessary for a successful partnership. You may find yourself constantly wondering if the person you are paying (or met through one of those sites) is genuinely interested in you or if they are simply interested in your money.
And if this is you and you are wondering, let me tell you—your fears are correct. They only care about your money, honey.
This uncertainty can lead to a lot of stress and anxiety, which is the last thing you need when you are already juggling a successful career. Never mind if word gets out to people who admire and respect you that your lady is on the payroll. Remember, cancel culture and #metoo is still a thing. Yet so many intelligent, successful men seem to think they can escape it—but believe me, it will catch up to you one day. Everything does.
Lack of Genuine Connection
Thirdly, relationships based on money often lack the depth and meaning that comes from a genuine connection. While you may be able to buy someone’s time and attention, you cannot buy their heart or true feelings. You will never honestly know if the person you are financially enabling cares about you or if they are pretending for the sake of your money. This lack of authenticity can lead to emptiness and loneliness, which is not what you want in your personal life.
A Slippery Slope
Finally, paying for companionship can be a slippery slope. Once you start down this path, it can be challenging to backtrack. You may find yourself spending more and more money on relationships that are not fulfilling because you don’t want to be alone. This toxic merry-go-round is the last thing you want when you have worked hard to succeed in your career.