I think most of us have been told or led to believe that “chemistry” is some magical, intangible force that we simply have no control over. I disagree with that. Over the years, I have known many people who have become attracted to someone over time. And I think attraction and chemistry is really one in the same. It is that feeling you get when you see that special someone. You want to touch them, kiss them and smiling around them, comes easy. So…if chemistry and attraction are one in the same…then it only makes sense that we can “become” attracted to someone over time, based on many many things—therefor we can create chemistry in the same way. I personally have met a few men, who, at first sight, I was absolutely not attracted to, but, rather than write them off right away, I gave them a chance. They were very nice and easy to be around, so, I decided to go out with them several more times. I can tell you that I not only became attracted to these men, but, over time, I was crazy for them….couldn’t keep my hands off of them. Talk about chemistry!
So, here’s the point. Meeting someone online, speed dating or for a quick drink is really not going to give you or them an accurate read on whether or not there is or will be “chemistry”. You really need to spend time with someone in order to see if attraction…..chemistry can happen.
Of course there are those that you will be attracted to immediately, but, that is not what I’m talking about here. If you really want to be in a relationship with someone and you are looking for love, then you have to be willing to give someone 3 dates—yes, 3 dates, is what I believe is necessary in order to truly give someone a chance. There will be those times that you go out with someone once and right away you know that their annoying habit, is an absolute deal breaker for you. That I understand. But, as long as they’re not completely annoying, if they are nice, kind and considerate…then I say, give it and them and yourself a chance to cultivate chemistry and find love.